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(To keep you from having to scroll down each time you visit, I've divided them into pages, there is no particular order, the new jokes will be added to the last page.)

Brains

A three year old little boy was examining his testicles while taking a bath. "Mama," he asked, "Are these my brains"?

Mama answered, "Not yet."

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Rope Dopes

There were 11 people hanging on to a single rope that suspended them from a helicopter trying to bring them to safety. Ten were men; one was a woman.
They all decided that one person would have to let go because if they didn't, the rope would break and all of them would die.
No one could decide who it should be. Finally the woman gave a really tourching speech, saying how she would give up her life to save the others, because women were used to giving things up for their husbands and children and giving in to men.
All the men started clapping.

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The Lord's Army

A friend was in front of me coming out of church on Christmas Day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside. The Paster said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!" My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."
The Pastor questioned him, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?" He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."

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Product Information

A husband is at home watching a football game when his wife interrupts, "Honey, could you fix the light in the hallway? It's been flickering for weeks now."
He looks at her and says angrily, "Fix the light? Now? Does it look like I have a GE logo printed on my forehead?"
"Well then, could you fix the fridge door? It won't close right."
To which he replied, "Fix the fridge door? Does it look like I have Westinghouse written on my forehead?"
"Fine," she says, "Then could you at least fix the steps to the front door? They're about to break."
"I'm not a damn carpenter and I don't want to fix the steps," he says. "Does it look like I have Ace Hardware written on my forehead? I've had enough of you. I'm going to the bar!"
So he goes to the bar and drinks for a couple hours. He starts to feel guilty about how he treated his wife, and decides to go home and help out. As he walks into the house, he notices the steps are already fixed. As he enters the house, he sees the hall light is working. As he goes to get a beer, he notices the frige door is fixed. "Honey, how'd this all get fixed?"
"She said, "Well, when you left. I sat outside and cried. Just then a nice young man asked me what was wrong, and I told him. He offered to do all the repairs, and all I had to do was either have sex with him or bake him a cake."
He said,"So, what kind of cake did you bake him?
She replied,"Hellooooooooo........Do you see Betty Crocker written on my forehead?"

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